I went to the doctor just to pick up a pill
When I left that place I was terminally ill, oh Doctor Negative
I went to the doctor I was looking for some hope
When I left that place I was drunk and shootin' dope, oh doctor Negative
Who put a human brain in the body of a dog?
What happened to the corpses that were stolen from the morgue?
Why the sudden rash of missing persons in our town?
What's become of misses Murphy, what's befallen misses Brown?
Went to the doctor for some medical advice
When I left that place they were packing me in ice, oh doctor Negative
I went to the doctor for a scrape on my knee
Next thing I knew I was buried 'neath a tree, oh doctor Negative
I went to the doctor for this growth on my chin
Next thing I knew, I'm in the spare parts bin, oh doctor Negative
I went to the doctor to remove this little wrath
So why am I the subject of a coroners report, oh doctor Negative
Who put a human brain in the body of a frog?
What happened to the corpses that were stolen from the morgue?
Why the sudden rash of missing persons in our town?
What's become of misses Murphy, what's befallen misses Brown?
I went to the doctor for a bump on my head
Next thing I knew I was flat out dead, oh doctor Negative, oh doctor Negative, oh doctor Negative