[Bart Baker]:
I've been a pop star for a long time
People's sexiest man alive
Now it's time for me to be seen
As a massive creep
That is why in this video
I look like a sick pedo
And why I'm stalking a lady
Like she is fresh meat
My beard's gross
This video's all about me
Maroon 5 is nowhere to be seen
I'm showing off my abs and all of my tattoos
I've done commercials bout acne
I've got a show on NBC
It is time that I show you what else I can do (yeah)
I can stand in rain in a hoodie
I can develop photography
I can hump pretend hunks of meat
I can act totally crazy
I can take pictures on my smartphone
I can smear blood on my hot muscles
This is just like 'American Psycho' (oh!)
How do I make my voice so high?
Breaks the windows every time
I use helium
I inhale it from these balloons
When I sing it sounds like the cry
Of a dog about to die
That's why animals
Always show up to my shows
GO AWAY!
This is the part I act real nuts
And cover myself in raw meat guts
[Maroon 5 band mate]:
Guess he forgot we're in the band too
Dick!
[Bart Baker]:
I look so good it's all about me
I am the one fans wanna see
[Sam Macaroni]:
I'm damn sick of Adam's attitude
[Maroon 5 band mate]:
This is Maroon 5 not Maroon 1
[JorDance]:
Even though now there are 6 of us
[Sam Macaroni]:
No one even knows who we are
[Maroon 5 band mate]:
Adam you're always the damn star
[Sam Macaroni]:
No one wants to watch this weird shit
[Bart Baker]:
Of course they do especially this
[Maroon 5 band mate]:
Check it out now he's acting like a wolf
[Bart Baker]:
Ooooowhoooooo!
[Gsnaps]:
Seriously Adam?!
You didn't tell me you were gonna pour blood all over me!
'Maroon 5'? More like 'Moron 5'!
(slap) UH!
[All Maroon 5 band mates]:
You're ruining our reputation!
This video's disgusting!
[Bart Baker]:
No it's artistic
[Sam Macaroni]:
It's just sick!
We're tired of this shit!
[Bart Baker]:
What the hell are you doing guys?
[All Maroon 5 band mates]:
Don't worry it's a surprise!
[Bart Baker]:
That's totally fine as long as I get more screen time
[Sam Macaroni]:
Oh you will!
[Bart Baker]:
I don't know why why why why
You tied me up I'm scared I'm
Too pretty to die die die
No!No!No!
[All Maroon 5 band mates]:
We won't kill you but you might
Want to commit suicide
After what we have in mind
[Bart Baker]:
No!No!No!
[All Maroon 5 band mates]:
And now it's time that we give
You a taste of your own medicine
By making your ass listen
To your own voice
[Bart Baker]:
AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!