If I had my own way
You'd be here with me today
But I rarely have my own way
I guess that's why you're not here with me today
And the librarian said
'You can't buy no respect'
I said, ‘Hey, lady, what can you expect
When I'm lying on the floor?’
Well I love the lady but you don't wanna be
No girl of mine
Well the only thing you ever done for me
Was help me waste my time
And I saw you at the funeral
You were standing there like a temple
I said ‘Hi! How are you? Hello!’
And I pulled up a casket and crawled in
Yes, I did
Climbed up a Mountain and I looked around
Some kind of circus with all them clowns
I said hey wait a minute can't we slow down a bit
And I almost got hit by a truck
Well it just goes to show you that we're all on our own
Scrounging for our own share of good luck
Stab your brother in the back
And pick up your pay check
Good-bye lonely heart drawings
You never did work anyhow
I'm looking for a nice girl
And I don't want no cow
I'm heading out West
Gonna find me the best
Well, I played the game but I failed the test
If I can't be a lover then I'll be a pest
Yes, I will