Everybody's got a hobby
Everybody's got a schtick
Please consider me eccentric
Don't think of me as sick
Didn't mean to spoil your party
I didn't mean to be uncool
But I'm standing here holding
The genitalia of a fool
'Cause I thought if I exposed myself
You'd fall in love with me
But when I burst in
To my chagrin
You had company
I'm afraid I've shown your family
the wrong kind of family jewels
'Cause I'm standing here holding
the genitalia of a fool
Well I guess the show is over
so I'll just go on home
I'll pack my prize possession
it's the nicest thing I own
Didn't mean to scare the children
or make your grandma drool
but I'm standing here holding
the genitalia of a fool
And I pray that you'll forgive me and try to understand
But I'm afraid you'll always picture me
with my whole world in my hands
and I'll go through life
just wondering how fate could be so cruel
Left me standing here holding the genitalia of a fool
Now I wish that you were holding,
the genitalia of this fool