New Christmas Song Lyrics

I SNEAKED OUT OF BED ON CHRISTMAS NIGHT,
AND WHAT I SAW REALLY NEARLY SCARRED ME FOR LIFE.
SANTA CLAUS WAS GOING TO TOWN.

I COULD SEE HIM BUT HE COULDN'T SEE ME,
WHILE HE WAS BANGING MY MUM BENEATH THE CHRISTMAS TREE,
SANTA CLAUS WAS GOING TO TOWN.

"HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD GIRL?" SANTA CLAUS SAID,
MUM WAS DOWN ON HER KNEES JUST NODDIN' HER HEAD
SANTA CLAUS WAS GOING TO TOWN.

"I PROMISE SOMETHING SPECIAL," THAT'S WHAT I HEARD HIM
SAY.
"IF YOU'RE A BAD GIRL FOR SANTA TONIGHT, I'LL BE GOOD
TO YOU CHRISTMAS DAY..."

HE MIGHT BE OLD AND HE MIGHT BE FAT
BUT MUM SHOULDN'T KNOCK BACK AN OFFER LIKE THAT CAUSE
SANTA CLAUS WAS GOING TO TOWN. MUM BRUNG HIM A BEER THEN STOPPED FOR A WHILE
THEN HE SPUN HER AROUND AND DONE HER PUPPY DOG STYLE
SANTA CLAUS WAS GOING TO TOWN.

THEN I HEARD HIM SAY "YOU'RE PEARL NECKLACE IS COMIN!"
THEN I THOUGHT TO MYSELF "YOU'RE A LUCKY GIRL, MUM!"
SANTA CLAUS WAS GOING TO TOWN.

CAN'T WAIT TO SEE ON CHRISTMAS DAY WHAT SANTA BRINGS
FOR MUM
CAUSE I HEARD HIM PROMISE HER ANYTHING AT ALL IF SHE
TAKE IT UP THE BUM.

OHHHHHHHHH! I WONDER WHAT DAD'S GONNA HAVE TO SAY
WHEN HE SEES MUM'S PRESENTS ON CHRISTMAS DAY CAUSE
SANTA CLAUS WAS COMIN...

SANTA CLAUS AND MUMMIN'

I SAW MUMMY SUCKIN SANTA CLAUS

SANTA CLAUS WAS GOING TO TOWN.

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