I was dumped by Jake Gyllenhaal, last year
So I bought this hipster voodoo doll, with a beard
I stab him here right in his Gyllen balls,
Still he won't return my calls, why?
I'm calling just to say that I've moved on, with my life
This will be the last time that I call, tonight
Do you mind if I sleep on your lawn
I say, I love you, we hates him, the precious, Smeagol
Oohoo oohoo oohoo
One side of me gets the hint but
Pttpttpttpttptt
This side is ogidy, ogidy, ogidy
We were never ever ever ever, actually together
Sweety remember-member-member, smoking crack together
We ate chalk and did bath salts and had sex with a tree
Um we have never ever ever, done any of that together
Like, we sort of did
My stuffed animals totally remember it
Yeah I remember that, me too
I swallowd a whole bottle of these pills, flintstones
These voices in my head feel like a drill, Gollum
He's telling me that we have to kill, your mom
But I can't seem to trigger this bomb
Mmmmmmmmm
I can't hear you through the gag
Oohoo oohoo oohoo
Looks like, I just need a new battery
She can never ever ever, be put back together
Now he, will never ever ever, give me back my sweater
I moved on and soon I'm gonna be a Kennedy, yippie!
Their family curse gets worse and worse with every century
They got shot, his plane got lost and this one's dating me
If he ever dumped me ever He will be dismembered
My precious