I want to be a playboy's bunny
I'd do whatever they asked me to
I'd meet people with lots of money
and they would love me
like I loved you
I want to be a topless waitress
I want my mother to shed one tear
I'd throw away this old sedate dress
slip into something a tad more sheer
I want to be an artists' model
An odalisque, au naturel
I should be good at spin-the-bottle
while I've still got something
left to sell
I want to be a cobra dancer
with Little Willy between my thighs
I may not find a cure for cancer
but I'll meet plenty of single guys
I want to be a brothel worker
I've always been treated like one
If I could be a back-street lurker
I'd make more money
and have more fun
I want to be a dominatrix
which isn't like me, but I can dream
learn S, and M,
and all those gay tricks
and men will pay me to
make them scream
I want to be a porno starlet
(for that I'll wait till Mama's dead)
I'll see my name in lights of scarlet
and get to spend every day in bed
I want to be a tattooed lady
dedicated, as I am, to art
Characters bold, complex and shady
will write my memoirs
across my heart.