This didn? t used to be me, old boy
This isn? t what I? d want
Pullin' old night fighters
In a restaurant
There? s smoke and flames behind me
Where the self-respect all went
And I? m behind, behind with the rent
I? ve been stitched up like a kipper, old son
But I won? t be again
Hell hath no fury
Oh, I? m like a lot of men
Now I? m stalkin? this old Doris
With lascivious intent
And I? m behind, behind with the rent
Just a little duck and dive
And a bit of wheel and deal
She? ll remind me I? m alive
She? ll remind me I still feel
Just a little shellin? out
For a bit of you-know-what
I know this is all about
Somethin' that I never got, oh
Well, this crumpet? s past its sell-by-date
But they all would qualify
They? re gonna be lonely
And be happy to comply
She knows that I? m a chancer
Comin? on like a gent
But I? m behind, behind with the rent
Yes, I? m behind, behind with the rent