Nero the rottweiler
Not the best dog ever
Big, and covered with black fur
Pees all over the furniture
Nero the rottweiler
Not the best dog ever
Every time we go walking
Half the time he's defecating
But you're better than most people
'Cause most people are assholes
And I'm allergic to assholes
Nero the rottweiler
Not the best dog ever
Just when we're having a blast
Runs off to sniff another dog's ass
Nero the rottweiler
Not the best dog ever
Even in romance he fails
Tries to mount and hump other males
But you're better than most people
'Cause most people are assholes
And I'm allergic to assholes
Nero the rottweiler
You're my best friend ever
And despite all of your faults
My friend, I will tickle your balls
Because it's what real friends do
I will tickle both of your balls