Haunt Me Lyrics

[Verse 1]
Look, I won't pretend I understand it babe
The afterlife and all
But as you died you promised me that you would try to write or call
And I've been waiting ever since
Every Sunday I hold seances with like-minded adults
And roll your corpse into the living room
And try and find your pulse
And then repine at the results
I've even got my windowsills lined up with ultraviolet bulbs Shrunken shrines of human skulls
And other signs of the occult
But now I'm at a f*cking loss, cause honey, nothing seems to work
Like I've been astrally projecting my body beyond my dreams
Through the fabric of space and time
So you could me spot me at the seams
I ventured through the upside-down hoping you caught me in between
But maybe if you've got the tech, then you could haunt me on my screens
Like you should infiltrate my news feed
I swear no one would notice
You could float beside some bogus BuzzFeed quiz about the POTUS
Be a pixelated phantom ghost
On clickbait propaganda posts
And dictate what you're thinking through a catchy headline
Like “one weird reason why it's great to be ethereal”
Or “twenty signs you're dead now and your soul is immaterial”
Or if it's late at night then you could swoop in from the shadow realm
And talk to me through pop-up ads that show up over adult films
On anything you're into
We could start with milf, or facial
You could beam your inter-spatial spirit into interracial
If you're feeling sorta formal, we could pizza date on Skype
And I could call the coroner over and we could share the corner slice
When it's time to go to bed, then we could leave our cameras on
And if the netherworld has one-day shipping free on Amazon
Then you could slumber as you ship yourself
I swear this shit delivers quick
Or send me the address and I could meet you by the River Styx
I'd Twitter beef with Namtar by the Tigris and Euphrates
I could snap you while I'm snagging sacred threads of life from Hades
I would loot Duat and photocopy-pirate the papyrus
Change the records and then have a Facebook flamewar with Osiris
And either way, I can't wait to talk or reunite
I've been so lonely since you died
I've tried to walk towards the light
And if the Gods of Death oppose our harmless want to reconvene
Then maybe we could sneak you by ‘em
If you haunt me through a screen

[Hook]
It's been far too long that you and I have been alone
You could rectify that if you haunt me through my phone No, I don't want to deal with voodoo dolls and figurines
I could do without them if you'd haunt me through my screen

[Verse 2]
I'm just frustrated I guess
I've hung out in countless graveyards
Drawn pentagrams and slaughtered goats
And even took a course on hunting ghosts from Pentecostal folks But never once have gotten close
Last month I sat with local psychics and their crystal jewels
And tried to find my old T-Mobile psychic phone from middle school
Just so maybe if you're bored of fortune-telling tarot cards
And magic words then you could tweet a hundred-forty characters
So I could throw away my voodoo dolls and stop chanting my juju mantras
That my guru taught us
And if you slide into some youtube comments
You could scroll the comment page
Or you could leave it blank
If your specter is perceptible we'd tell 'em it's a prank
And if you still don't send responses, I'd assume the problems technical
And I would call Verizon just so someone could inspect it all
I'd tell him I just want a close encounter of the spectral kind
He'd ask if I turned on our modem router for a second time
And plugged it incorrectly to the voltage-power socket line
And tried to tear a portal hole through to your paranormal soul
So me and you could catch up on a toll-free spirit-mortal call
Or we could see a witch doctor
She'd probably be skeptical
Clinician with a stethoscope
The specimen non-skeletal
The symptoms metaphysical
The convalescent soulless
At first, her diagnosis could be we should try hypnosis
But truthfully, if you can choose that way you're reborn
I hope you use the 3G phone and you eschew the ouija board
At this point, I don't really know why I learned ESP for
When you could just descend and settle in my USB port
Or my NVIDIA GeForce or my video AV cord
There's no need for Santa Muerte
When I've got a QWERTY keyboard
We could play a game of e-sports
You and I'd be on a team
If you're feeling otiose, I'll put my audio on stream
I still have your favorite games babe, I've got em' all on Steam
We'll get started when you're ready
Once you haunt me through a screen

[Hook]
It's been far too long that you and I have been alone
You could rectify that if you haunt me through my phone
No, I don't want to deal with voodoo dolls and figurines
I could do without them if you'd haunt me through my screen

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