"She left her school for the factory,
From pocket money to a salary,
From a pac-a-mac to her compact case,
And every morning she inspects her face.
She discovers pulling pints in pubs,
But her good looks will never cover up for her dumbness in taking
the stock, Sees her reflection in a butcher's shop.
She finds it all quite rare, that her meats all vanity fair.
She finds it all quite rare, that her meats all vanity fair.
She has her eyes on medallion men that get her home on the dot
at ten.
She combs her hair when she gets excused,
The deal she wants always ends up screwed.
Paints her nails on the bathroom scales,
Gargles her breath like a landed whale,
Her beauty is as deep as her skin,
Keeps her eyebrows in a tobacco tin,
She poses foot on a chair, coconut shy but vanity fair,
She poses foot on a chair, coconut shy but vanity fair.
In her vanity case, her compact case,
In her compact case, her eyes.
Not bad for a sister, but her vanity's fair and her sense of humour's
dry.
She comes home late with another screw loose,
She swears to have had just a pineapple juice.
Falls asleep fully clothed in her bed,
With her makeup remover by her head.
And she might not be all there, but her dreams all vanity fair,
She might not be all there, but her dreams all vanity fair."
Lyrics by Chris Difford and Glenn Tilbrook.
From the 1981 A and M album 'East Side Story'.