William Finn Miracle Of Judaism Lyrics

[JASON]
Dot Nardoni, Tiffany Axelrod
Zoe Feinstein, Angelina Dellibovi
Bunny Doyne, or what's her name
Mo Cristofaro, or Heather Levin
Brittany Rosenthal, which
Flo Giu... Giu... what is the name of that bitch
Flo Giuseppe, right, but it borders on kitsch

Of these girls
Which should I invite to my bar mitzvah
I've a problem to flaunt:
I don't want the girls I should want

(His family cheers him on at the baseball game)

I want girls for whom I lust
Girls who wear a lot of makeup
Girls who smoke and show their bust
Girls with whom I always wake up- (Jason misses the ball, the guy says "strike one!")

Would they come though
If they were invited
And not laugh
At my hebrew
And not laugh
At my father and his friends

(Jason misses the ball again, the guy says "strike two!")

Excluding them, I find exciting
And I'm left with them, I'll be inviting
Selecting girls for one's bar mitzvah
God, that's the miracle of Judaism

(Jason misses the ball again, the guy says "strike three, you're out!")

That'd be the miracle of Judaism