I found some diaries from when I was thirteen, and 
they're filled with half-invented stories, boring dreams 
and little drawings from classroom windows where 
tetherballs rattle, limp, on their poles. I was surprised 
that there was nothing really in them about me that was 
remotely real, until I saw volume three changed 
completely about twelve pages in; then, tragedy kissed me 
full on the lips. When I re-read what I wrote, I get a 
lump in my throat, and it lingers in whatever I say. 
Cradling what was left of a beloved pet unraveled years 
and years of burying pain. It's essential that this is 
taken to hart, because these lessons have been tested by 
all the losses we've suffered so far. So I nominate my 
kitten for the King of the Dead. Seven years have passed, 
and now I'm back to this: distant, dogmatic, the words 
flow from my lips, like in these pages of false history 
dragged from attic to attic with me. So, Sara, listen 
close: I want you here alive. And, Gail: I reserve a spot 
at your bedside. Carla, I've been through all of this 
with you, and I know you remember it, too. That ceremony 
was the last thing that we ever did in that time zone 
again. The origins of hope, wrapped in shoebox and rope, 
dragging us from our world of pretend. Chorus.