Weird Al Didn't Write This Song Lyrics

I've got all the porn I can get, so now I'm searchin 'round the net
For some Metallica albums I haven't downloaded yet
They've had more misses than hits lately and greatly gone soft
But I do it just because I know it pisses them off
I go on another hunt and check another locale
For stuff I want and find a folder titled OLDER WEIRD AL
It's news to me but here's an early Billy Joel parody 'bout buggary
Called "It's Still Just a Hole to Me"
Believe me when I tell you the shock value astounds
It's a catchy little tune using crappy MIDI sounds
Recorded by a teen working in a machine shop
And the singer sounds like William Hung gargling a mop
How could anyone think Al had this done?
Oh right, the average IQ online is 81
So I give up, I don't even try to understand why
These songs are written by this WIRED Al YANKOVICH guy!

[Chorus]
Weird Al didn't write this song (nuh-uh)
Weird Al didn't write this song (no way)
Weird Al didn't write this song
He'd never sing about how to use the fishes to farm, c'mon
Weird Al didn't write this song (nuh-uh)
Weird Al didn't write this song (no way)
Weird Al didn't write this song
But he did do a movie with Long Duk Dong

("What's happening hot stuff?")
("OH GOD!! YOU'RE SO STUPID~!!")

[Devo Spice]
First of all, let's talk about the spelling of Weird
It's W-E-I-R-D, see, just to be clear
The I before E thing doesn't apply
Because weird is just a weird word - that's why!
His full name is Alfred, not Allen or Alice
But it's not a secret like that guy {?} on Dallas
If you have trouble recollecting his name, here's a game
Imagine him preparing dinner for a young Bruce Wayne
But really, you don't even need to know that bit
His name is Al, call him Al, A-L and that's it
His name is two letters long, but I include it in this song
Cause a disturbingly large # of people get it wrong
Finally, let's talk about his last name, it drives me insane
Saying YANKOVICH should be profane
If you can't spell his name, I'ma show you how now
It's Yankovic, with a C, there's no H say it with me now
There is no H in Yankovic - say it
There is no H in Yankovic - again
There is no H in Yankovic - louder THERE IS NO H IN YANKOVIC~!!

[Chorus]
Weird Al didn't write this song (nuh-uh)
Weird Al didn't write this song (no way)
Weird Al didn't write this song
And he's never been on stage in high heels and a thong
Weird Al didn't write this song (nuh-uh)
Weird Al didn't write this song (no way)
Weird Al didn't write this song
It was me who wrote the tribute to the size of my schlong

[Interlude]
Ay, aiyyo yo yo, aiyyo Devo Spice
I'ma let you finish, I'ma let you finish
But Sea Monkey, writes the best Weird Al parodies ever
I'm I'm just sayin

[Devo Spice]
Just because a song is funny doesn't mean it's done by Al
And everyone I come upon threatens to give me a grand mal
Does the same lack of knowledge make it back to other tracks?
Just because a song SUCKS doesn't mean it's Nickelback
Yet every parody I see is credited wrong
As if he and only he can change the words to a song
The filesharing sites are uncaring how they store it
I'm still workin on this song and I just found a torrent for it
Al works clean so that should be your first clue
That he didn't write the song about {*reversed*}
And hello mudda, hello fadda, just in case there's any doubt
In fact no, he didn't write it, he was 4 when it came out
Lots of other people write parodies too
And you can hear 'em on the FuMP every month and we do
A span of Robert Lund, Steve Goodie, Luke Ski
Dynomite, Project Sisyphus, and oh yeah - ME!!

[Chorus]
Weird Al didn't write this song (nuh-uh)
Weird Al didn't write this song (no way)
Weird Al didn't write this song
I don't care what the credits say, the credits are WRONG
Weird Al didn't write this song (nuh-uh)
Weird Al didn't write this song (no way)
Weird Al didn't write this song
You may think that it was Al but it was me all along

[Outro]
Hey Devo, have you heard that track Inner Voice by Adam Sandler?
Heh, it's hilarious
(Oh c'mon, are you kidding me?)
(This is ridiculous! I wrote that song with Worm Quartet in 2005)
(#1 song on the Dr. Dimento show!)
(And I can't even miscredited to Al, it has to go to Adam Sandler)
(Geez! What am I gonna do? How am I ever gonna get anywhere?)

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