[Intro]
EPIC RAP BATTLES OF HISTORY!
WOLVERINE!
VERSUS!...
FREDDY KRUEGER!
BEGIN!
1, 2, Freddy's coming for you
3, 4, better lock your-lock your-lock your-lock your
[Verse 1: Freddy Krueger]
Welcome to primetime, bitch
Better stay awake like a meth head
Spread red on your bed spread 'til you're lying there on your deathbed
You got a healing factor?
I got a kill-bitches-on-the-ceiling factor!
Under that mask, you're a singer/actor
Under my skin I'm a slasher/slasher
Bitch! I come from Wes Craven's twisted mind!
You come from comic books that kids get when they're well behaved at Christmas time!
Flock of Seagulls called
They want their hairstyle returned
And that wasn't even my main diss
It was just a side-burn!
[Verse 2: Wolverine]
Nice glove, bub
But I'm real from bones to teeth
That claw's like a strap-on
There's a p*ssy underneath.
Don't sleep? That's all you got for me?
Could defeat your ass with a cup of tea
I been to hell and back and whooped Satan's ass
You got beat by a Nancy on Elm Street!
You wanna talk about burns, Mac?
The PTA turned your face into Deadpool's ballsack
Wrapped in a Where's Waldo sweater
Jason can't talk and he rocks the mic better!
So step into my catnap!
See if you can hack that!
Better hang on to your wack hat
'Cause your worst nightmare ain't Hugh Jack shit
Compared to the least of my Weapon-X flashbacks!
I'm the adamantium champion X-Man
You'll only ever be half of Edward Scissorhands!
So don't get me more pissed, chump
I'll take your whole franchise out with a fist bump!
[Verse 3: Freddy Krueger]
Look at the size of your body; how could I possibly think I'm in trouble?
I can't tell the difference between your action figure
And your stunt double!
What's the matter? You look tired, eh?
I'll be in your bed tonight, unlike Jean Grey
As for me? I'm a chick magnet
So heavy metal bitches are real attracted
What the f*ck is a wolverine? Some kind of an angry beaver?
I was more intimidated by a tiny canadian the first time I saw Justin Bieber!
[Verse 4: Wolverine]
That verse stung, bub
But I've already recovered
I'll call you tomorrow morning
If I need my toast buttered
I ain't got time for this!
I'm saving the world, what qualities do you bring?
You're a pedophile from the Midwest
At least R. Kelly could sing!
So you've got the wrong room if you're looking for fear
Only thing that scares me is a fridge with no beer!
That face tells me you've met your match
So come back if you've got another itch to scratch
[Outro]
WHO WON?
WHO'S NEXT?
YOU DECIDE!
EeeeEEEEPIC....RAP. BATTLES...........OF HISTORY!