Burke And Hare Song Lyrics

I'm Knox a famous surgeon
And I earn my daily bread
By studying cadavers
Which are bodies not long dead
One day two swarve young gentlemen
Appeared within my view
I'm Mr Burke, I'm Mr Hare
How do you do?
These gents explained that their
acquaintances had just passed away
It seemed the body'd only been
A goner for a day
Excuse the curious offer
Said Hare or was it Burke?
But would you care to slice this up
To see how corpses work?
Well it's always a palaver
Getting hold of a cadaver
So I said yes iI'll have her
Oh, it's a he!

This body taught me much about
What makes a person poorly
Why some men live to 99
And some die prematurely
How these thing function perfectly
And others won't repair
How everything is, interlinked
Oh what's that doing there?

'til one day there was nothing left
And all my work was spent
Then Burke and Hare turned up again
My, how convenient!
Another slab of fresh
Human organs, bone and flesh Another gory sesh, excellent news
(laughs evilly)

As time went on these kind men
Brought me several guys and gals
My lab was choca-block
With all their freshly passed on pals
I paid them lots of money
Bodies came from everywhere
You really are a busy Mr Burke
And Mr Hare

They seemed such cultured gentlemen
I never did suspect
That Burke and Hare were not so nice
I really should have checked
Then one day a policeman came
Asked if I've seen a chap
I hadn't, but days later
His corpse turned up in my lap

It seemed that these acquaintances
Of Burke and Hare actually
Were not their friends and
Did not always die naturally
Burke and Hare had murdered them
It was plain to see
Then brought the corpses to my lab
And pocketed the fee

The two men were arrested
But one of them set free
Poor Burke was hanged
But happily his corpse was sent to me
Oh bit whiffy!
Still, much to learn

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